How are we doing?

People keep asking me how things are going with Ben gone.

Answer: We are surviving. When he left we knew that this would be the hardest one. Being that it is the first time he is leaving and that I am having a baby any day. I keep telling myself that if I can make it through these two weeks I can make it through anything else that is thrown our way with this new job. So we have made it to the end, he is on his way home. In just a couple hours he will be here.

WE DID IT!

We are all so excited. Last night none of us slept. We were all just to excited. Yesterday the kids and I made Dad a welcome home sign and both kids made him a card.

So what did dad miss?

Not much of anything. THANK GOODNESS! For the most part we did a lot of sitting around. I have been to scared to do much of anything for fear of going into labor. But I did some organizing and a little sewing too.

Other than that we had one day that i was deathly ill. I could do very little that day but we survived. My kids are amazing! Slade totally took can of his sister and me. Talk about a big job for a 5 year old. He got her milk in her sippy and fed them both (cereal) for breakfast and lunch. He would check back with me about every half hour to see if I needed anything and kept bringing me glasses of water and rinsing my washcloth with cold water for my forehead. i felt so bad letting him take care of us like that but he kept telling me that he really liked taking care of me because I always take care of him... what a good kid. Madie kept sitting by me and rubbing my back and telling me "Mommy, I take care of you" seriously so sweet! That night Grandma came and picked the kids up, fed and bathed them and then brought them home to go to bed. I am so grateful for great kids and great in laws that help me out so much.

So now we will have our Daddy back for 2 weeks. And is this ever going to be an exciting two weeks. We can't wait to meet our new little girl!

Security

I always thought that most kids had a security item. You know something that they had to take everywhere with them or at least sleep with.

Me, I had a bunny. Not a stuffed animal, but more of a small blanket type thing with a bunny head on it. I still have it. It is now one big long ratty string attached to a bunny head. I took it everywhere as a kid. My brother had a blanky.

My kids, not so much...

Slade has never had anything that he insists on having and Madie... well I am pretty sure that I am her security item. I can not get her to go to sleep unless she is snuggled up tight against me with her arms tightly holding my arm.

Last night as I was lying in bed thinking about how weird it was to not have Ben there (last night was his first night gone) I started to think about the little almost 3 year old that was wrapped around my right arm. I thought about how I was her security item. Sure she will sleep without me there but she sleeps much better holding on to me. This made me start to think about how much my sweet husband has become my security item.

I used to be totally self sufficient. I never asked for help. Well who am I kidding... aside from Ben I still never ask anyone for help. Now I have found myself in a situation where I am going to have a baby any day and my Security is gone. I feel pretty lost without him. I have had tons of people beg me to let them help me and Ben also asked some people to check in on me and help me while he is gone even if I don't ask.

I am so grateful for him and all that he does for us and is willing to do for us. I know that leaving us was really hard, especially right now. But I also know that this is what he has felt is best for our family. I know that I have yet to come to this conclusion but I think that my own desire to have it easy and have him home every night is slightly over shadowing any feelings of rightness that might be trying to get through.

So now what? Perhaps I need to find security in myself again. Or maybe I need to just adjust the role my Security plays in my life.

I know that him leaving for work is not the worst thing in this world. I know that there are many people that have it far harder than I do. But for today, I miss my husband.

I love you Ben!

A big adjustment

There are lots of things changing around our home.

If you notice our baby countdown you will see that in about 35 days our little lady will be joining us.

Our great big 5 year old is starting kindergarten tomorrow.

And now...

Our Daddy is starting a new job...

In North Dakota...

Next week...

Ben is going to North Dakota to work in the oil fields. He will be driving a gravel truck. He will be gone for two weeks and then home for two weeks. We are very excited to have him all to ourselves for two full weeks every month, but none of us are looking forward to him being gone for two full weeks either.

I am very nervous!

Besides the obvious that our baby is coming pretty much any time now and fearing a reenactment of our late night run to the ER last week, I am a bit on edge. I keep looking around at our half acre plot of land and it is looking more like 10 acres to me. Our cute little house is looking like a mansion. I keep making mental notes of everything that Ben does that is now on me. Even the easy things that should be no big deal are feeling a bit overwhelming, like rolling the garbage down to the road every Friday.

This is certainly going to be a big adjustment for all of us.

We talked with our Dr and she said that she would induce me the week before I am due so that Ben can be here for the delivery and still have some time with little Baby A before he has to leave again. So we are praying that she cooperates and decides to hold off until he is back home. To be on the safe side Ben has officially put me on light duty until she comes.

Anyway, wish us luck.

And if you see me at the grocery store and I look like I should be committed to some sort of mental hospital, please just smile and tell me I look pretty or some sort of lie.

A Scary night!

Last night was one of those nights that you hope will never happen. The evening itself was totally normal. We all went to bed and then about midnight I woke up in excruciating pain in my belly. For about 15 minutes I tried to adjust my position to relieve the pain - no luck. I finally woke Ben up and told him what was going, he tried rubbing my back, my belly, anything that we could think of to alleviate the pain. By this point I was in so much pain I could barely roll over.

So Ben called Mountain View Hospital. The nurse told him that I should try a warm bath and that we should call EIRMC because they couldn't handle a baby at 34 weeks there. Then I started to freak out. I think that it hit me how early it was and just the thought that we might need to go in and get her checked out.

I got in the bath while Ben called EIRMC. The nurse there told Ben that he needed to bring me in. I got dressed again and Ben called Tyson and Laura and got the kids up. We dropped the kids off at Tyson and Laura's house and Ben drove something like 90 mph to Idaho Falls. Oh yeah - don't worry, our gas light came on as we were leaving Tyson and Laura's - perfect!

We got to the hospital and within 5 minutes they had me changed and in a bed. They put the fetal heartbeat monitor on me and there she was loud and clear - WHAT A RELIEF! They told me that I was dialated to 1cm but was not in labor, however I was contracted... not contracting, but one constant contraction. They ran a bunch of tests and found that I was a bit dehydrated and that there was some protein in my urine. Then they ran some more tests and found nothing wrong.

They gave me a shot to help relax my uterus and hopefully get rid of the contraction. This made me super sick so they gave me another shot to help with the nausea. Both seemed to help but the pain never completely went away. They had me rest for a while  and the pain started to return. The doctor came in, felt my belly, and then said we could go home.

WHAT? I still could not get out of bed on my own and could not stand up to save my life. The doctor said that it was braxton hicks and that I was dehydrated. They said that if it became excruciating again to come back ...again? ....I just told you that it was returning. Hmmm. Ben and I both told them that we were still concerned. They told us that basically the baby is fine (phew) and that I needed to just go home and deal with it.

We came home and I went to bed. Around 1 o'clock this afternoon the contraction actually went away and I can move again. But boy o boy that was a long 13 hours.

We are so grateful for all of our amazing friends and family that helped us with our kids, letting our puppy out, meeting the carpet cleaners this morning. But most of all I am grateful to my Heavenly Father for keeping our little lady safe and for giving me a husband that took such good care of me.  

So while everything turned out alright I am sure hoping that I don't have to do that again. That being said I realized how unprepared I am. So now I will be spending my time getting things packed and ready for little baby A.

Our home this morning

Things are a little crazy at our house this morning.

This is my dining room...

We are having our carpets restreched today and getting them cleaned tomorrow. So in the mean time all of our furniture is stacked in the dining room. The kids think that it is great. They got to sleep on their mattresses in the living room last night and thought that was the coolest thing ever.

This morning Madie got up and put on her church shoes (this is an everyday occurrence) and then put this "camera" around her neck. It is actually a headlamp that she found in Daddy's tools. And of course her outfit would not be complete without her "cocolate chip" also known as Chocolate milk.

She is walking around doing this.

She keeps telling Slade and I to say cheese.

And of course since the camera came out so did Derek Zoolander...

He is such a cheeser! He loves to have his picture taken.

These two sure make me smile!

Lumberjack

Have you ever heard Slade sleep? He snores. He snores LOUD! As long as I have been around he has - he was 18 months when I came into his life, he is 5 now. People that have heard him sleep have often said that he sounds like a little lumberjack.

Yesterday Slade's mom and I took him to see an ear, nose, and throat specialist. The doctor said that since he has sleep apnea he needs to get his tonsils and adenoids out. The nurse came in to schedule his surgery and the only days that were available before he starts school were the 3rd and the 19th. We were afraid that he was not going to heal in time if we waited until the 19th so he is getting them out tomorrow. Two days is not much time to mentally/emotionally prepare ourselves or work through it with Slade but that is what we had to work with.

We told him that we will go to the hospital and they will put a mask on him and go to to sleep. When he wakes up he will have a sore throat. He seems okay about it but I think that he has been a bit distracted by the fact that we have been letting him eat whatever he wanted for the last day and a half.

Tonight we took him to the store and let him pick out a whole bunch of soft food and ice cream too. I think that he is pretty much thinking that this getting his tonsils out thing is the greatest thing ever. I doubt he will feel that way tomorrow afternoon.

I hate that he has to have this done. I wish so badly that I could do it for him. I know that this is something totally routine but it is so scary when it is your child that it is being done too.

Tonight before he went to bed Ben gave Slade a blessing. I am so grateful that my husband can bless our children. After Slade got his blessing Madie jumped up and yelled "my turn", so then Madie got a blessing too.

So at 6:30 tomorrow morning we will up at the hospital awaiting his surgery. If you feel so inclined feel free to say a little prayer for my little buddy.

28 Weeks

I never take belly pictures. When I was pregnant with Madelyn we did one photo shoot only because my Mom begged for it.

This happens a lot, Mom begs for pictures and I am horrible at taking them and even worse at getting them off of my camera.

Looking back now I am sad that I never wrote down more about being pregnant with Madie Lou. So I thought I would try to write a few more things down from this little lady. Little disclaimer - I am not complaining about any of ailments, I am just recording.

First things first... A belly picture just for you Mom...

At 28 weeks...

• I am measuring about two weeks big.
• I am 4 lbs under the weight that I was at my first appointment with this baby. Apparently being pregnant is a great diet for me. The doctor is not worried about my lack of weight gain though because our little lady is still growing.
• She moves a ton and will let people feel her. When I was expecting Madie she would always stop moving as soon as I would put my hand on my belly. I think that Ben only felt Madie move a handful of times.
• With Madie I threw up just about every day the entire pregnancy. This baby I have random days that I don't feel great and have not had many throw up days at all.
• This baby kicks my bladder constantly.
• For about 2 months now my arms and legs have been almost completely numb due to the way that the baby is sitting. My doctor suggested going to a chiropractor but to be very honest they TERRIFY me! So for now I am just trying to deal with it and pretend that it is totally normal for people to not feel their limbs.
• I have officially reached the point that I would rather wear Ben's basketball shorts than anything else. If you come to my house don't judge me if I look like I am taking up being a gangsta. Ben likes to call me Missy Elliot.

We are so excited for this little lady to join our family.