Taking a time out

I have been at my breaking point the past couple of weeks. I miss my husband and I think that the holiday season is only making me more lonesome for him. I feel like my kids have been out of control lately or that I have no patience for them... Or both!
Because I am feeling so overwhelmed with my kids I am trying to do extra to serve them (isn't that what we are supposed to do, serve the people that are the most difficult to deal with... Wow I am ashamed to feel that way about my kids). Anyway that is why I am trying to do extra for them this Christmas, I don't want the feelings that I am dealing with to ruin their Christmas.
Anyway I have an amazing best friend. She knows I have been struggling and checks in with me everyday. Tomorrow we are going to lunch and then she is going to take my girls for a little while so I can go to the spa for a facial and a massage (Ben's Christmas present to me last year). I am so excited! And I am so grateful for a good friend that cares so much for me. Thanks Beth!

So tonight I had plans to take the kids to our ward Christmas party. I was doing some laundry and Abbi was pulling on my leg wanting to be held. I picked her up, plopped her in a empty laundry basket and told Slade to push her around the kitchen so I could finish rotating the laundry. As he was pushing her around I heard her giggling and soon Slade was giggling, then Madie started squealing that she wanted a ride too. Before I knew it I was laughing too. So I got another laundry basket and had Madie hop in. Them we lined up and had races around the house. IT WAS SO FUN! Needless to say we never made it to the ward party, we were having fun and I realized that I would have to put real pants if I was going to leave the house.

This has me thinking. I know I need to take more breaks from my kids. It is healthy for me and them and I know I will be a better mom if I take a little time for myself every now and then. I also know that my job is not to be my kid's friend it is to be their parent, but I think sometimes it is important to play with them like I am their friend too. Our whole night went better tonight because I took 15 minutes to be silly with them.

How is it that I am just figuring this out now? I guess I just have to figure out how to better balance this parent/silly time thing. I just hope that I figure this out before I loose my chance.
I love my kids. They are my everything.

Anyway sorry to get so serious on ya but thanks for the talk. I am sure tomorrow will be great!

On a completely unrelated note... I am sure you think I am becoming a crazy cat lady but I just think this is cute. Our kitty, Twinkles, has decided that under our Christmas tree is a great place to nap. So cute!